nothing more than nothing

a song for u. listen if u feel like, close this window if u dont,


http://202.205.107.80/jigoushezhi/xingzheng/guangbotai/gbt/Music/Energy-dawyt.mp3

future seems fixed. both mine, and hers. i decided to free her from her miseries, miseries of being with me. for freedom she leaves, and i stay her at the same spot, wondering if she will ever turn back. i suppose she wont, she said she wont. she is uber determine this time. how strong of her, the side of her i guess i never know. well well, does it matter?

i prayed today, at bugis temple. i pray for my family, my studies, and my beloved one. i hope she will be happy. she said she will be happier like this now, so i tink, i shall answer my own prayer.

IF ONLY MY PRAYERS REALLY COME TRUE AND GIMME GOOD GRADE


i will nv forget u..u will live in me forever..love u too much to let go, at least for now

i know le. acty i knew le. its just.. more clear now. i see everything. actually, its all as i thought. thank u. thank u

there are too many doubts and questions but im not going to get answer. so how? must i assume and presume bout stuffs?

CONCENTRATE! EXAMS!

when friends become foes, do u still have any friends?

cmon. dont tell or ask me wad to do or should do. i wont be exactly listening ya?

if i offend anyone, sorry. if i piss anyone, sorry. if i screw anyone, sorry. if there is misunderstanding, sorry

im perhaps failing in my life, since sec sch, maybe still failing. i cant tink, but i know one ting.

i have to concentrate on exam

=)

one more ting. to ms barbara, im not a gangster, i will not go and bash people. dont u think i get the name to create trouble. i will be disappointed in u

wad de fuck? i dunno wad the fuck ppl want. i am getting wrong idea in one moment and the other, i was jus fucked up. dont tell me what the fuck to do and what the fuck not to do. i know no fucking bullshit bout no fucking shit. fuck this man. dont ask me why im so vulgar or why am i so fucked up now. i am not fucking hell telling any fucking ting. i jus wan the fucking ting to be in the way i want it but i tink it is not going to be and never going to be. that fucking guy i had always doubt. fuck man. im nv going to do any fucking ting silly. dont tink im a fucking gangster alright? dont tink im gona do anything to the fucking bastard esp aft i know who the fucking bastard is. i already guessed so. i shd jus fuck off yea?

unappreciated. hated. thats what im tinking. fuck me up if u hear me. slam shit into my face and let me eat. do whatever cuz i do not care anny more bout this fucking shit. its fucking ruining up my mood. i jus fucked up cuz i am fucked up.

FUCKED UP

PS: PLEASE DO NOT COME AND ASK ME BOUT ANYTHING. FRIENDS OR FOES, MEANT GOOD OR BAD.

today..today went school for FP lect..i thought is revision but it isnt. so i waste my life inside. im pretty afraid of FP. we get an A for FP project but it seems scary. no common test, revision for only 1 hr next week, a for project, it all seems lke a trap. lol but everyone is saying its not that terrible, but i can see the fear in them..

anyway had marketing presentation..its pretty tiring as its pretty long. then we last group some more, so we have to wait. till our turn. we are the only group that finish in 20min, so i believe we are suppose to use it as "advantage". ms hello kitty say we acty can get A, but we didnt do any preparation last week in tutorial, so we are penalised and get a B+. im satisfied and i believe the rest are

then go present EC again. still as bad as ever. sickening. still wan us to submit by monday. he made sure it was tough on me. basket

im not determine..i am not at all.. i never knew im such weakling. fuck

today EC presentation is bullshit. its junk. i had to redo. FUCK TOO. afa make up tut get back afa retest. 50 over 100. its another FUCK.

FUCK UP WORLD FUCK UP PLACE FUCK UP ME FUCK UP SCHOOL FUCK UP ENVIRONMENT FUCK UP FOOD FUCK UP TRAFFIC FUCK UP WHATEVER FUCK THAT IS FUCK UP

im not determine..i am not at all.. i never knew im such weakling. fuck

today EC presentation is bullshit. its junk. i had to redo. FUCK TOO. afa make up tut get back afa retest. 50 over 100. its another FUCK.

FUCK UP WORLD FUCK UP PLACE FUCK UP ME FUCK UP SCHOOL FUCK UP ENVIRONMENT FUCK UP FOOD FUCK UP TRAFFIC FUCK UP WHATEVER FUCK THAT IS FUCK UP

i feel skinny! i ate only a small plate of rice for dinner, and a waffle for lunch! i ate the rice at home so i can consider that i save money today. but i did waste money on others that cost more. i went for a movie

i went to watch "night at the museum" in the morning. it was a great show. the cinema was so empty. i had nv tried sitting alone in a cinema before. cold physically and cold mentally. anyway it was a nice show. nice effects and so.

then went school do shit and so. then i went to esplanade to chill. almost fell asleep there. sky is clear with pretty much stars. but its somehow different. i went home to eat my chao fan. well, thats all. i still had yet to make my decision

i tink, i didnt fully recover from my illness till now. i still having cough.

i dont understand. i had been recently and mentally tired. very tired le. it feels like..i dont know what. jus fucked up.

exam is coming. i have to change my attitude, my mind and target soon. to get pass all the paper, hopefully with a better grade than usual.

i decided. i wanna go watch movie tomorrow morning. either curse of golden flower or night at museum. they are ending and i aint downloading them. jus wanna continue the normal routine, the monday routines. then gotta go school do ec. what ever happen doesnt matter to me i guess. mm

im fucking off!

ho ho ho this is gonna be my exam schedule:

9th feb fri AFA 9-11
10th feb sat EC 9-11
14th wed PMKT 2-4
15th thu FP 2-4

must work hard, last semester le. though i fail alot for common test but i will work my very best for exam. i jus dowan stay in NP anymore!

today woke up at 9.30am. met him at 12 at marina square. i was early. left the house with kor ma..lols..marina square is DAMN empty la.not to mention cityhall was damn empty. LOL..read the book he told me to read at kopitiam while waiting for him to arrive..its real interesting.

umm..after he arrived, we went to Zara to take a look, and then went to Mango..saw THAT top! but XS was gone..*SOBS* only left S.. but still tried it on for him to see anyways..he thinks its hideous.. -.- anyways, we left, but i kept on going abt hw the shirt was nice and great..and gorgeous..then he just kept laughing.. -.- then we walked over to suntec to checked out the Mango store there..but it wasn't on the shelf, or it was sold out. which is hihgly impossible..didnt see anything esle i liked.. :/ then we went to toys r us..he wanted to get me a tamagotchi 2 if i dont buy the top.. LOL..but no..HAHAHAHAH. :x then we went to the arcade..i won him in bball as usual. :Pp then we played this jungle game like jurassic park..MAN, im telling you.. I SCREAMED LA..its really freaky..after we passed the first stage, my palms were really red and numbed to carry on..nt long before we ended the game. lols..then we tried playing it 1 more time..and..well, he died first. HAHAHAHAAH..then me..oh well..it was freaky la..worse than house of the dead 4.

after arcade we went to carrefour, looked at books, he bought 2 for me, and 1 for himself..i have tons of books to read now..o.o after that we went to play at the coin machine thingy. u insert the coin and turn the knob and a toy in a ball rolls out..we both got the same thing..thats sad. LOL. then we had ice cream! and left to marina square again cos i thought of asking them to check other outlets that has the top. :Pp so we arrived at marina square once again..they made a phone call and guess what? SUNTEC HAS IT LOL..i was telling the lady, but we just went suntec and didnt see them on the shelves..then she said, it has not been displayed yet..so i begged him to walk back to suntec with me..lols..lotsa commotion and stuffs, but i got my shirt in the end! :DDDD LOVES. :Pp

we walked to Bugis frm suntec..went to bugis street, he wanted to buy a pair of shorts and jeans..but didnt fancy any..then we walked and walked, walked to bencoolen there, then had burger king, and left for my house. stayed for dinner and then left.i just figured out that monday afternoons are the best time to shop! LOL..

hi here i am again. i was bout to log into my blog when i logged in wrongly, back into my old blog. its funny it had only 2 entries before being dumped. dumped for good. lol and i shall proceed....

i went to meet her this morning at jurong east to watch death note 2. its a rather nice show with alot of twist. although people had said that it had a major difference with the anime, its still a top show i would recommend to all if u did watch death note 1.

then i realise how forgetful i am. i had napfa today but i forget to bring my shoe after packing it up. i left it at home. so after i send her home, i went back home to take my shoes before i go back to school to do my napfa

its rather good i guess. i tink i got a silver. its more than enough. i can escape the early NS threat

situp - its rather funny cuz the guy who counted for me is a big joker. he went like "1..2..3..4..5..6...7..8..9..10..12..14..16.." bull shit guy but i thank him. lol. but seriously i dont need his help but since he offered, oh well [5]

shuttle run - it took me 2 try for this. the first try i dropped the block, causing it to be 10.4 sec. i was rather sad so i went for a 2nd try. i end up with 9.6 sec, 1 that im so satisfied with [5]

standing broad jump - supposed to be my best and i was a slight disappointed cuz i didnt get all 5 marks, lackiing by 2 cm. darn [4]

sit and reach - they fucked me up. all i can reach is 39 cm. it says a NO to my gold. i need 41 cm! [2]

pull up - this is wad i trained for..last time. i was first to go all the time cuz im first in the grp. so i went. i did 7, all rather standard, arms fully straightened. im satisfied with this 3 points [3]

2.4 run - the last one and the most tedious and bastard-ess one. i ran first 3 round within 6 min, 5 min plus, but i started to die off. u felt my throat, my lung, and my everything working against me. im starting to see the syndromes of my recent unwell. but i manage to complete before 12.30 min, 1 min lousier than my sec 4 result. that was worth 2 points, ensuring me a silver. rather sad. i walked pretty much, definitely more than a min. [2]

21 points i assumed, if i didnt remember anything wrongly. so i settled for silver. yay

omg im terrible ill-ed, i guess. i went to suntec alone yesterday to look for cheap books. they are clearing at $3 and $5, depending on which books u take. so i went there to look for books and in the end i stood there and choose for an hours. the crowd is terrible and i could feel my whole body aching and tired. after getting the books, i went back home on 16 and i feel rather terrible. i reach home in delight cuz my dad bought my fav food, the SATAY BEE HOON from redhill. it was wonderful but perhaps it was the beginning of my misery. i felt terrible

i slept at 1+ and i woke up in pain at 0330. i had a terrible headache, fever, and muscle ache. i even feel like puking. when im ok and i settle down to lie on my sister bed, i fell asleep and she woke me up. i was terribly shocked and i jumped up. its not funny = . anyway could only fell asleep at 5 am in my mum room due to the pain. then i gotta get up early for ECD today

i woke up at 8 to move back to my bed. i had to get up from bed but i went to sleep cuz im ultimately tired. i woke up at 9, being quite late, took cab to parkway to collect the fridge from scoopz, the ice cream store. the woman is si beh sia lan. i shall not elaborate. then i took the fridge alongside 2 ah neh and go to YUHUA cc for the ECD bazaar. was very tired and i keep taking nap. other than that, i was basically walking around and hugging jiahao and guofeng. lol. then blah blah. come to the end of the day. its almost 8 and 3 guys come back to buaya jocelyn. lol so funny. we all packing then they keep talking, dun care bout us like that. sucker. then ah neh come take fridge then she wake up. damn zzz. anyway then take cab home, with a tub of cookies and cream in hand and a coke. was still terribly unwell and i should really rest now.

thanks 小胖 and co for the help for today. thanks for the other groups of my class and thanks to everyone.

OFF TO REST!